Lucky Witches Read online

  ‘Dowel,’ he answered, once he’d switched with Jared. The circle turned golden, and he moved to the next.

  Although I was still standing next to Arnold, I was feeling a lot less comfortable about it. His comments towards Jared had reminded me of just why I disliked him so much in the first place. He hated Jared purely because he was a vampire. And, granddaughter or not, I knew that he had equally bigoted feelings about the fae.

  ‘It appears we’ve come to the last question,’ he said. ‘But … I think that our lucky streak might be about to come to an end. I doubt that there’s a single person in the cave who can answer this one.’ He peered more closely at the question, wrinkling his nose. ‘The song known as Girl, I Want Your Sweet Teenage Worship All Over Me reached number one in Ireland for six weeks in Two Thousand and Two. Name the band and the album.’ He winced. ‘Oh dear. Well, at least we gave it our best shot.’

  There were depressed faces all around the cave. And a small part of me wished that my face was just as depressed. Feeling my skin go aflame, I stepped towards the board and swallowed. ‘I know it,’ I said in a squeaky voice.

  Roarke and Greg calculated the weights, and Arthur counted them out and handed them to me. I moved slowly towards Dylan, realising that I had been wrong in my assessment of the circles. I’d thought they were small, and that manoeuvring players would mean getting incredibly up close and personal – and being incredibly limber at the same time.

  Well, the circles weren’t as small as I thought. They were smaller.

  I could see that the closeness was affecting Dylan too. His skin had turned just as red as mine felt, as we brushed against each other far too many times and swapped the weights around.

  ‘Okay,’ he said, jumping away. ‘Let’s hope you know it.’

  I took a deep breath and said, ‘The band’s name is Dean Danger and the Danger Boys, and the album is called Jailbait.’

  Even though the circle was clearly glowing gold, and there was no question that I was correct, the jaws of the others hung open.

  ‘Parents let their teenage daughters listen to that band?’ Arnold looked disgusted.

  ‘Good goddess.’ Dylan shuddered. ‘Well, I’m glad we’ve put one of them in jail. I might just have to think up some excuses to go and arrest the others. And their management company, too.’

  While the others muttered their agreement, my eyes were on the oak that I was now standing beneath. It was changing before my eyes. No longer was it an old, dead tree. It was quickly coming back to life, and in the most amazing way. As leaves began to sprout from the branches, those leaves turned golden. The whole tree began to shimmer, and I could see into the shimmer again, just as I had first done in the holding pen. Powerful magic was taking place. The wards were being restored.

  I glanced down at the board, and every single circle was shimmering. The ogham letters along the spiral were transforming, spelling out a sentence in English:

  Congratulations, player. You have beaten the greatest game the world has ever known. I sincerely hope you’re not a witch. Love, Randall.

  I turned to the others. ‘Hey! Stop moaning about how inappropriate some old boyband may or may not have been. Look, you idiots! We’ve done it. We’ve beaten the game!’

  There was a moment of shocked silence, and then they all ran onto the board, screaming in delight and grabbing one another in hugs. Well, most of them ran. Arnold stood, resting his weight precariously on his cane. ‘You did well,’ he said quietly. ‘An Albright through and through.’

  I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Luckily, I was saved from doing so when the strongest, most perfect arms picked me up and spun me around.

  Unfortunately, those arms didn’t hold me for long.

  Dylan set me down, clearing his throat and moving away from me. ‘Well done, Ash. Well done all of us. We’ve achieved something monumental here today.’

  ‘We have,’ said Grace, wiping her eyes (I was sure she was going to tell me it was a mascara problem later on). ‘And we’ve done it by working together. I feel rather schmaltzy right now. I think we should all go to the Fisherman’s Friend to celebrate. The first round is on me.’

  ‘Um.’ Jared scratched his head, looking awkward. ‘That’s great. This is all great. But we’re kind of forgetting one thing. We still don’t know who did all this. But we do know that the person has a genie at their disposal. Shouldn’t we, I dunno … get on with tracking them down before they do something even worse?’

  I’m not sure whether it was the joy of having won the game, or whether it was the fact that, even for a very short time, I had been in Dylan’s arms. But whatever the reason, it felt as though every cell in my body was flaring to life. And quite a few of those lively little cells were in my brain.

  Everything that had happened since Sean’s death began to replay itself in my mind, and I suddenly knew the truth.

  ‘I know who it is,’ I said. ‘I know who has the genie.’

  23. If Wishes Were Kisses …

  As Dylan and I drove along the road together, I saw many of our human neighbours trudging back towards the main street of Riddler’s Edge. Hilda and the gang were one of the small groups making the walk. While she and some of her cohorts were still holding their gardening tools, they were doing so in a far less frightening manner.

  Dylan rolled down his window. ‘Can I give anyone a lift?’ he asked. ‘It’s going to be dark soon.’

  The postman scratched his head, looking exhausted and confused. ‘I’m not even sure why we’re out for a walk to be honest, Detective Quinn. We seemed to have some crazy notion in our heads, but I can’t remember what.’

  Mossy moved forward. ‘I think maybe you should have one of your drug experts go and take a look at Hilda’s flowers, Detective. Because I have a feeling there’s something funny about them. I think we might have all been unwittingly drugged.’

  While the others nodded their heads in agreement, Hilda scowled. ‘There’s nothing illegal about my flowers.’

  ‘Oh?’ Dylan arched a brow. ‘So what are you all doing out in no man’s land, then? Where’s the last place you all remember being?’

  Hilda’s scowl intensified. ‘We were in my flower shop, if you must know. Having some sort of meeting. I can’t quite remember about what just now. But if there is something wrong with my flowers, then it’s nothing to do with me. It’s that foreign supplier. He’s the one you want to be looking into.’

  I can’t say I was all that surprised at Hilda’s comment. She was an equal-opportunity hater, I’d give her that.

  Dylan seemed to be doing his best not to roll his eyes. ‘Well, if none of you want a lift, then we’ll be on our way.’

  ≈

  As we walked up the steps of Greg’s apartment building, I saw Grantly standing outside, waving his hands in front of Beth’s fountain.

  ‘Shouldn’t that fountain be gone already?’ said Dylan. ‘Most of the other chaos coin wishes seem to have worn themselves out.’

  Grantly reddened. ‘I … well …’

  ‘It’s okay, Dave,’ Dylan said. ‘We already know that you’re a genie. Is Beth inside?’

  His eyes filled with panic. ‘I … she … how did you figure out it was her?’

  Dylan gave me a proud smile. ‘I didn’t. Aisling did. Beth told her she won three wishes, and used them to give herself a butler, pay her rent for a year, and give herself an enormous, fancy apartment. But apparently she also has an ugly car, some diamond jewellery, and a few more very expensive items.’

  ‘Plus she didn’t behave like the people who actually won the chaos coins,’ I added. ‘They were all afraid someone would try to steal what they’d wished for, whereas Beth was delighted to show everything off. Oh, and you do seem to glide rather than walk. As a matter of interest, how did she get you to work for her? Dylan here has been telling me that genies need some very strong persuasion in order to grant wishes to witches.’

  Grantly – or Dave – looked at his polis
hed shoes. ‘She found me a few months ago. I thought she was great at first. I thought she loved me. She hated witches as much as I do so … we had that much in common. But then she broke my lamp and forced me to commit unspeakable crimes for her. Only the person who breaks a genie’s lamp can put it back together so … I’m stuck with her. And I’m completely under her control.’

  ‘That’s awful!’ said Dylan. ‘We’ll try to do something to remedy that.’ He reached into his pocket and palmed a small, round device, hitting a button on its surface. ‘You’re disempowered for now, Dave, so she can’t force you to do anything against your will. Just one question – did any of Beth’s wishes involve granting her power?’

  Dave shook his head. ‘I can’t grant magical power. I can only be forced to use my own.’

  ‘Phew,’ said Dylan. He banged on the door. ‘Let us in, Beth. And don’t bother trying to get Dave to help you wriggle out. We’ve disempowered him.’

  There was an audible gasp from within. A moment later, Beth answered the door. She had even more diamonds on than before, and she was holding the largest bottle of champagne I’d ever seen.

  ‘Whaddya want? Can’t you see I’m busy?’

  ‘I can see you’re drunk,’ I drawled. ‘Beth, we know what you did. We know that you forced poor Dave to work as your own personal genie, and that you made him hire the chaos demon. But just tell us … why?’

  Her bloodshot eyes filled with fury, and she pointed her finger towards the south. ‘Because they’re all entitled idiots in Riddler’s Cove, that’s why.’

  Dylan cleared his throat. ‘Riddler’s Cove is the other way, Beth. You were born into the Berry coven, I believe?’

  She tipped her head back and took a few swallows, before wiping her mouth. ‘They told my mother to abandon me because I’m unempowered,’ she rasped. ‘And – maternal angel that she is – my mother agreed. And I don’t see why you care, anyway. You’re unempowered and a dayturner, Dylan Quinn. I thought you’d hate those tossers in Riddler’s Cove as much as I do. You should be glad I messed up the wards.’ She drank a little more, grinning and letting champagne dribble down her chin.

  ‘So you knew the full truth about the lighthouse?’ Dylan frowned. ‘But …’

  I could understand his confusion. Everyone knew that the lighthouse was important to protecting Riddler’s Cove, but no one was supposed to know why. If she knew about the lock stone, then surely her knowledge would have destroyed the wards long ago.

  Beth shrugged. ‘I knew something was up with that place. I knew it was the boundary point, but I didn’t know how or why. Finally I heard the tale of Randall the Riddler.’ She took another dribbly drink. ‘I met a vampire who used to live here in Randall’s time. He didn’t know the full story, but he had an ancient scroll that he’d never managed to open, something he’d stolen from the Albright coven. He might not have been able to open it, but I could. With the help of Dave, anyway.’

  She blew a kiss to the genie. ‘Thanks to my boyfriend, I was able to find out all about the lock stone, and how Riddler’s Edge would no longer be hidden if the stone went unturned. Randall was an amazing man, wasn’t he? His rules were very specific. The lighthouse keeper and the Albrights couldn’t tell anyone about the wards. But because I found out by other means, the damned protections stayed in place.’

  She threw the bottle towards me. Just as I thought it was about to collide with my face, it stopped and fell to the ground; as it smashed, champagne spilled over my boots. Dylan smiled and nodded to the locket around my neck. It was shining brightly, and I was ever so slightly amazed. It was one thing to be told what Impervium could do, but it was quite another to see it in action.

  In her drunken state, Beth didn’t seem to have noticed anything strange. She just kept right on ranting. ‘I worked very hard on all of this, you know. I mean, I had Dave hire a chaos demon! Do you know how much that cost me? But I needed the place to be a mess. I needed everyone to be distracted. I knew that if there was fighting and accidents and madness going on everywhere, then no one would notice the detective’s friends having some accidents of their own.’

  ‘So you killed Sean, and you tried to kill Roarke and Greg.’ I couldn’t help but glare at her as I spoke. ‘In order to get revenge on your mother and a whole lot of other witches who didn’t do you any harm, you killed a human, and tried to kill a wizard and an unempowered witch. Wow. You really know how to get people on your side, Beth Berry.’

  She held her nose up. ‘I didn’t kill anyone. I made Dave do it for me. But he failed miserably in all but one murder. Some genie. Still … it did the job. Humans are probably readying their bombs around now.’ She paused to cackle. ‘I’d like to see a spell that can stop a bomb in time! I can’t wait to see that town blown to smithereens. I only hope they blow up my mother and the rest of the Berry coven while they’re at it.’

  Hmm. I could think of one Berry I wouldn’t mind seeing blown to smithereens.

  ‘No one’s blowing anyone up, Beth,’ said Dylan. ‘We’ve restored the wards.’

  She stopped cackling, and her face fell. ‘But … how? Randall himself made sure that it was impossible. He created a game. A game so difficult that no witch could ever win.’

  Dylan shrugged. ‘A witch didn’t. But a few witches did – along with a wizard, a vampire, some unempowered witches and a dayturner.’ He sighed. ‘I get why you’d hate witches, Beth. Really I do. But none of us are ever going to get anywhere if we stay angry about the past. You know how we won that game? We won it because we cooperated. We worked together.’

  It looked like she might be about to give him a scathing reply, but Dylan silenced her with a stare, and held out a pair of cuffs. ‘Beth Berry, you’re under arrest.’

  ≈

  As Beth sat scowling in the car, we stood talking with Dave.

  ‘She can’t wish on you while you’re disempowered,’ I said. ‘But that means you might have to stick around for a while until we figure out a way to fix your lamp. Who knows? Maybe Beth will agree to do it herself.’

  Dave snorted. ‘I don’t think so. I used to live round here actually. Quite a while ago, mind you. There was this gorgeous vampire lady I was into. Nollaig Montague. Used to run a place called the Vander Inn.’

  I felt myself grinning from ear to ear. ‘She still does, in fact. I live there myself – and I happen to know that there are some rooms free. It’s as good a place to hole up as any until we get your lamp fixed.’

  ‘Wow!’ Dave shook his head, looking bemused. ‘Beth was so wrong about you.’

  ‘About me?’

  ‘Yeah. She said you’re a stuck up know it all argumentative witch. Well, she said it with a B, but I think you get my meaning.’ He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small golden coin. ‘I’d like to give you this. Maybe you can think of a wish that’ll benefit you.’

  ‘But it’s not green,’ I said. I clapped a hand over my mouth, unable to believe my stupidity.

  Dave tilted his head back, looking at me more carefully. ‘I thought I sensed some sióga in you. Don’t worry, I won’t go spreading it around. My stars! Some of the witches I’ve known in my time would like to get their hands on a faery almost as much as they would a genie. But … this isn’t a chaos coin. It’s a bona fide wishing coin. But the rules are similar. No infinite wealth or infinite wishes. One wish, and this one will wear off by midnight the next day. No badness will come of it. I give you my word.’ He held up a hand. ‘And I can see your mind ticking away there, Miss Smith. I know you’re thinking of wishing my lamp back together. Only Beth can do that, so don’t waste your wish.’ He pressed it into my palm. ‘Please. Use it. You deserve it for helping me dump the girlfriend from Hell.’

  ≈

  It took a little while to process Beth, because things were only just beginning to settle down. For most people, the effects of the coins had worn off by now, but there were still a few clusters of chaos going around.

  Although the Wayfarer
s were finally out of Witchfield and Beatrice Wayfair was once again the Minister for Magical Law, they had little time to recuperate. Most people now knew about the chaos coins, and it had been proven without a doubt that the recount had no merit. But there were a few of Darrell Plimpton’s supporters – and a dozen or so Peacemakers – who were desperately clinging on.

  According to Gretel, this was just like any other week for the Wayfarers, and I tended to believe her when she said things would be back to normal very soon.

  Either way, I was definitely in need of some recuperation of my own. I’d barely had any sleep since all of this had begun. I definitely hadn’t had enough to eat. So when Dylan pulled up outside the Vander Inn, all I could think about was Nollaig’s excellent cooking and my lovely claw-foot bath.

  ‘Hey, hang on a minute.’ He leaned across to my seat and picked up the coin Dave had given me. ‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’

  I shook my head. ‘I’m not sure I want a coin – even if it is a genuine wishing one instead of a chaos one. Whatever I wish for, it will still be gone far too soon.’

  He gave me a searching look. ‘Things don’t have to last forever to be worthwhile, Ash. You could wish for a fancy spa treatment, or the most amazing holiday in the world … I can think of quite a few things I’d wish for if I had a coin like that.’

  I slid back into the car and closed his palm around it. ‘Well then, you can have it. My gift to you.’

  As I went to get out of the car again, he pulled at my hand. ‘Do you mean that? You want me to have a wish? Because if you do mean it, then I know what I want to wish for.’

  ‘Of course I mean it,’ I said. I went to pull my hand away – not because I didn’t like the sensation, but because I liked it far too much – but he held on tighter.

  ‘Stay in the car,’ he said. ‘Please. Stay in and close the door. This is the kind of wish that requires your consent.’